Friday, April 1, 2016

A Whale A Week: Special April 1 Edition...This Bud's For You!

This very special A Whale A Week is one I've been saving up for just such a day as today!

Bud Light

This amazing crowd-pleaser has been around since 1982 and its about time someone gave it the whale treatment!  AB-INBEV--formerly Anheuser-Busch Brewery--is known for its incredible market clout, Superbowl ads, horses, and of course it's famous eagle!  Currently touted as American, the company is owned by a business conglomerate located in Belgium.  I've been on the VIP tour at the old flagship St. Louis brewery and it was quite an eye-opening experience.  They were bottling "imported" Beck's beer that day.  


For this tasting I invited over AWAW alumni Dave Manley and Steven Mathistad.  My wife was unwilling to take part in this one--choosing instead to sip on some Waconia Brewing Mo' Winta' Stout.  The beer was lovingly served into the appropriate drinking vessel.


Eric: They've really brought out the best here!  I know there's no corn in this beer, but I swear I smell it.  Corn?  I don't remember eating corn!  
Dave: Aromas of jock sweat and toe jam.  A hint of athlete's foot remedy--but can't decide if its Desinex or Tinactin.
Steven: Aroma is subtle with a hint of bad decisions and scary flashbacks.


Eric: Very light in color, almost full albino but minus the red eyes.  About the same color and appearance as a freshly collected urine specimen--just more foamy than it ought to be, perhaps someone suffering from proteinuria?  
Dave: Dead ringer for an Onterrio Smith urine sample run through a Whizzinator.  Wispy head (just like Onterrio Smith).  
Steven: Looks crisp and clean, like a nice hardy cider.  Not much head--although it lead to plenty in college!


Eric: Pretty sweet, with a hint of frog sweat--not poison dart frog, just regular frog.  I can't taste the Triple Hop at all!  Body is a bit thin, but less filling!  Slight taste of desperation.  I can tell that this was brewed the hard way just from the lack of any distinguishing characteristics.  Makes me want to party with Seth Rogan.  
Dave: Malty like a steamed hot dog bun sitting in a Metrodome vendor box.  Hot dog water used in the brewing process, I'm sure.  Hops: I'm sure there was a picture of hops somewhere in the brewhouse when they made this...
Steven: Flavor profile gives the impression of emesis and defecation.

Overall Impression:

Eric: I'm not sure this really gives me the #UpForWhatever kind of feeling that I was promised by clever marketing.  I'm pretty sure that the Clydesdales were a bit over-watered on the day they collected this sample--I want more pungency and Premarin horse estrogens out of this! 
Dave: Solid 5.  Makes me want to paint my face and go to a Devil's game with Puddy.
Steven: Makes me want to build a time machine and go back to my college years to beat the crap out of myself for ever cracking open one of these liquid bottles of monkey piss. 

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